Visit Potluck Monday for more inspiring Poetry!
Transported by a tympani of steadily falling
rain sluicing from the roof, I sit watching you
dance in the deluge, cold droplets
dripping from your chin
You haven't yet sensed my intent study
of your eyes, searching a distant view with
focused intensity turning the whiskey color
a different hue
Raspberry colored lips twist wistfully
into a smile, whispering indiscernible
words - a name, a prayer, lover's thoughts
drifting away on the air
In the blink of an eye, I wonder: was I
really there?
~ ~
This piece is one of my favorites...hope you enjoy it for Potluck Monday. Have a great week everyone. :))
Love,
Eaton.
glad to see your talent shine, so very vividly...
ReplyDeletelove the image, timeless moment here.
Eaton
ReplyDeleteWow! I definatly enjoy this! your word choice alone makes me silly...meaning I keep reading this piece outloud for the sheer joy of how words like sluicing and deluge feel as the form and then roll into spoken words!
So happy you joined the Jingle Potluck!
http://www.itslovelyannie.com/2010/10/04/elemental/
Easy to see why you favor this...breathtaking images you have created...
ReplyDeleteThanks for this.
You have not yet sensed my intent study of your eyes.. what a beautiful way to say it... and the end to bring you to reality whether you were there or not.. perfectly ended.. I enjoyed it thoroughly...
ReplyDeleteॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
Twitter: @VerseEveryDay
Blog: http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com
Happy Tuesday!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the beautiful contribution!
Lovely. This in particular is just fabulous:
ReplyDeleteTransported by a tympani of steadily falling
rain sluicing from the roof
Strong, evocative work. Really dig this one
Warmest Salad
Luke
Your word choices in this is just fabulous...outstanding work and thanks for linking with Potluck.
ReplyDeleteWith Luke on this one, Eaton. A perfect line ...
ReplyDeleteA perfect poem, in fact. I think you must have worked hard on this one ... word selection, pacing, cadence... Nice. Good job ...
Poem on ...
Happy potluck...hope you enjoy your visitors and visits.